Both ambition and arrogance are focused on getting something. An ambitious person develops a game plan and works hard to get a cherished goal while an arrogant person believes they're entitled to something and either demands to get it or just pushes others out of the way to get it. Ambition and arrogance are not mutually exclusive. You can be ambitious and arrogant at the same time.

What I'm beginning to notice is that both ambition and arrogance can be situational. A person can be ambitious or arrogant at work but not at home. He can be ambitious or arrogant in terms of a hobby (wanting to win the gold medal or feeling that he is the only person entitled to the medal) but not in terms of personal growth or spiritual development. An ambitious person isn't always ambitious nor is an arrogant person always arrogant. And although we judge one quality as being better than the other, it doesn't mean that the person who's ambitious is better than the person who is arrogant or that the arrogant person is better than the ambitious one. We may prefer to be around one type of person versus the other, but that's usually determined by our own personality and our psychological needs rather than by the characteristic itself.

For me this points out that I shouldn't just lump a person into a category and think that's the way the person always is nor should I judge the person based upon my interactions with that person in only one environment. I do myself and the other a disservice if I always react to somebody as if he or she is exactly the same 24 hours a day, 365 days a year and in every situation.

If I label somebody as ambitious, I cast them in a positive light and may overlook all the times the person has canceled our time together in the name of their ambition or when I had to sacrifice some other resource to help them achieve their goal. I may hold back my truth (my feelings of disappointment or sadness) because I judge their need as being more important than my own. This keeps me from being my authentic self and prevents me from giving the other person feedback that will improve the quality of our relationship. This does not create a not a win/win situation nor does it lead to long-term happiness.

If I label somebody as arrogant, I may bristle at whatever the person says or does because I make the assumption that everything the person does is going to be in their best interest, not mine. I may also assume that the person is judging me (as less than he or she is) when in fact that's not automatically the case and I may look for every opportunity to "knock that person down a peg or two." Again, this does not create a win/win situation nor the basis for a healthy business or personal relationship.

What I've learned is to just be in the moment – to notice what's going on around me, to notice what I'm feeling and thinking and then to act accordingly all the while focusing on having win/win relationships. This involves not generalizing that one arrogant act makes an arrogant person or one ambitious act makes an ambitious person. This also involves not judging one character trait as being better than another. 

For me, that's what enlightenment is about. It's not just a mental process, it's a state of being. It's about being able to determine how I want to be in any given situation without having to change anybody else. All I have to do is to observe the situation or the character trait and then determine what I want to do about it. It's my attitudes and feelings that determine the quality of my life. By not labeling or judging another, I am free to see the gifts and special qualities that person brings into my life. Granted, sometimes it's just to spotlight how I don't want to be, but that too is a gift.

Ambition and arrogance are just character traits. They don't paint the entire picture of a person. By seeing beyond the labels, we create win/win situations as we open ourselves to more positive experiences and to manifesting more of our own best qualities.