We show our true character by the way we approach the challenges in our life and, believe me, there will always be challenges.

The challenges I’ve overcome in the last ten years are a testament to my strength, courage, perseverance, faith, trust and my willingness to be my most vulnerable self. I didn't start out being courageous; it was an acquired skill. My journey was very difficult at times but I’m proud of the me that has emerged. I've gone through 2 major incapacitating inuries, job losses, financial hardships, the death of one of my best friends, moving 4 times in less than 2 years, and a host of other things. In retrospect, I can see the value in everything I went through. Each challenge that I faced head-on made me stronger and more capable of handling the next challenge, and the next challenge, and the next challenge...

Below are eight of the insights I've gained as I faced and overcame obstacles in my life. I hope the lessons I learned will empower you to see your challenges as opportunities to become who you want to be and to live the life you want to live.

1. Accomplishment requires effort, and effort requires resistance. Without challenges and obstacles standing in our way, it would be impossible to achieve anything. If there was nothing to impede you, everything worth doing would have already been done. And where would be the joy in a world such as that? In other words, without challenges there would be no accomplishments. The two go hand in hand. 

2. Success is a process, not a static state. If you’re making headway against the obstacles, you are successful. The greater the challenges, the greater the potential for fulfillment. Celebrate every step you take on the path to your goal because once you've overcome an obstacle another one will show up. This is a never ending process so feel good about everything you do that allows you to have more joy and less stress in your life.

3. The persistence and effort that go into any accomplishment, serve to distinguish and substantiate it. The longer and more assiduously you work on something, the more securely it is yours. Appreciate the challenges. They make success meaningful, and possible. Don't give up. You may just one choice away from achieving a goal.

4. Nobody can handle your challenges for you — no matter how much we want them to.  If you are a fearful person, you try  every conscious and unconscious trick in the book to get somebody else to solve your problems for you. You make yourself sick with worry so somebody will feel sorry for you and handle YOUR challenge. That way you have somebody to blame if things don't work out the way you want them to and you get to continue to feel like a victim. To quote Dr.Phil McGraw, "How's that working for you?"

5. Fearful people get manipulative, trying to transfer the responsibility for solving the problem to somebody else. With the responsibility, you're also transferring the ability to control the quality of your life so again you get to hold onto the illusion that you're a victim. When you give up control, you're left with feelings of powerlessness, anxiety, depression and/or numerous other symptoms of stress and you deprive yourself of developing the personal strength and stimina to overcome future obstacles that appear as you journey through life.

6. When your are in "victim mode," you get overwhelmed and easily distracted. You procrastinate. You wallow in self-pity for so long that you get incapacitated. In other words, you do all the things that cause you to hold on to your challenges even longer than necessary and, sometimes, you acquire additional problems along the way. People who never take responsibility for their own lives or face their challenges are depriving themselves of the opportunity to feel empowered and proud of their accomplishments. It's a very high price to pay.

7. When you are courageous (you know the one's I'm talking about, the ones that "feel the fear and do it anyway"), you get stronger and more confident every time you overcome an obstacle with its accompanying fear. You  do whatever's necessary to move beyond your challenge. You strengthen your character and see yourself as being triumphant rather than as being victimized. You experience all your feelings, including feeling scared, as long as necessary and you don't let them stop you. You know fears are just thoughts you think over and over again and you have the power to change your thoughts and the right to change your mind. When you are courageous, you don't run away from emotions by heading for alcohol, drugs, food or any other self-destruction solution.

8. If you understand the value of overcoming challenges, you acknowledge your anger, express your fears and concerns in healthy ways and keep your forward momentum going. Even though your hands may be shaking and you may be powered by blind faith and trust, you take one step after another to move beyond your current challenge. At the end of the journey, you feel triumphant because you know deep inside that you have built up the inner strength necessary to help you handle the next challenge that you'll face. You know the only way to feel strong is by facing each challenge as it arises.

You don't know how truly powerful you are until your strength is tested. It's by being courageous that you gain courage. So appreciate the challenges and gain power by exercising your strength of character.